Accept the reality of your careging Situation


God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can; 
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time; 
enjoying one moment at a time; 
accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; 
taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it; 
trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will; 
that I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
forever in the next. 

Amen.


Upon returning from the rehabilitation center, I spoke with my mom about getting back into our usual activities. I was overjoyed to have her home again and eagerly shared my ideas for us to spend time together and enjoy her favorite pastimes. However, she replied, "I’ve been through this before; I don’t want to do that." In that moment, my heart sank, as it felt like she was giving up on life.

After reflecting on that conversation, I began to grasp and accept the changes we were facing. I had to confront the reality that my mom was battling a terminal illness, while my mind was still coming to terms with it. She had accepted her situation, but I had not yet reached that point.

When accepting the reality of changes, we often struggle with accepting reality because it hurts.  We often deny because of the pain we feel.  Use the following guidelines to help you process and accept the change. 

1.  Accept the reality of your careging situation 

Begin by recognizing and accepting your current reality without judgment. It’s normal to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, or even in denial. These emotions are part of the process. Facing them head-on allows you to embrace the journey. 


2.  Educate yourself about the care receivers  disease 

Educating yourself about a care receiver's disease is essential to providing effective and compassionate care. Here’s how you can gain knowledge and build confidence in managing their condition:

    1. Start with Reliable Resources

    • Reputable Websites: Use trustworthy medical sources like:
      • Mayo Clinic
      • WebMD
      • National Institutes of Health (NIH)
      • Disease-specific organizations (e.g., Alzheimer’s Association, American Cancer Society).
    • Books and Guides: Look for books written by medical professionals or caregivers with experience in the specific disease.


    2. Consult Healthcare Professionals

    • Ask the Doctor: During appointments, prepare questions about the disease, treatment, and expected progression.
    • Specialists: Seek advice from specialists (e.g., neurologists, oncologists) who focus on the condition for books written by medical professionals or caregivers with experience in the specific disease.

5. Let go of what cannot be changed 

Many caregivers carry expectations about how things "should" be. Letting go of these can help you focus on what is. Embracing your journey means shifting your mindset from "Why is this happening?" to "How can I make the best of this?

6. Seek and accept support 

Accepting reality doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. Reaching out to others—whether through caregiver groups, therapy, or loved ones—can provide the perspective and strength you need to embrace your role.


Ultimately, reframing your mindset regarding your caregiving journey will create a more meaningful experience for both you and the person receiving care.







Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Weariness comes and goes

Let us  not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time, we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians  6:9  Dear Caregivers:  Ever feel like you're playing a never-ending game of life Jenga? Balancing being a superhero spouse, grandkid wrangler, full-time work wizard, business boss, and volunteer extraordinaire, all while adding caregiving to the mix? Phew! It's like trying to juggle flaming torches while riding a unicycle! It's no surprise you hit the exhaustion wall. So, what's the game plan now? As the solo offspring of my mom, we've hit the switcheroo jackpot – I'm now the mom, and she's the kid! It's like a classic tale of kids turning into parents when their own folks need a hand. I gladly take on this new role with a heart full of love. I'm beyond lucky to share a wonderful bond with my mom, and I'm certain that if our roles were reversed, she'd have my back. That's just the kind of amazing mom she is. When my gran...
Read more

Self care looks different

Self-Care Looks Different for Everyone As caregivers, we hear the phrase “don’t forget to take care of yourself” so often that it can start to feel overwhelming. But the truth is, self-care doesn’t have to look like the picture-perfect images we see online. It doesn’t always mean a spa day, a vacation, or hours of free time that many of us simply don’t have. Self-care looks different for everyone. During my caregiver journey, my self care included going for walks, having a good night sleep, or taking advantage of outings with friends.  However for some of caregivers, it’s enjoying a hot cup of coffee before the day begins. For others, it might be taking five deep breaths in the middle of a tough moment, going for a short walk, or listening to your favorite song. Sometimes self-care is as simple as saying “no” when you’re already stretched thin, or giving yourself permission to rest without guilt. The important thing to remember is this: self-care is not about how it looks on the ou...
Read more

Spouse Caregiving

“Find a good spouse, you find a good life— and even more: the favor of God!” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭18‬:‭22‬ ‭MSG‬‬ I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my lawfully wedded [husband/wife], to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part" I have been married for nearly 30 years, and we have truly lived out each vow we made to one another. The most difficult one has been dealing with sickness. Witnessing my spouse confront a serious illness is incredibly challenging. In the past decade, my husband has faced multiple serious health issues, resulting in five hospital stays. Fortunately, he has triumphed over every challenge. My time as a caregiver has been somewhat limited lately. I often joke with my husband that his life is like a cat with nine lives.  Although my caregiving role is not extensive, I occasionally assist him with making appointments, attending appointments and deali...
Read more